Saturday, September 29, 2012

You will hate me for these ...

" I'm an emotional mess.
I have awful mood swings.
My hair always looks crap and weird.
My lack realization of how much other people care about me.
How dependent I am on others.
How often I feel stupid.
I'm just not that great at putting my feelings into words.
When I’m alone with my thoughts, I think of the perfect things to say. But when it comes to confrontation, pressure or the time to lay it all on the table; I get tongue tied and say the wrong things... sometimes I even say the complete opposite of what I intended.
I push people away. 
I complicate things. 
I hurt the ones I love the most. 
I cause drama for myself. 
I’m a burden to other people. 
I feel like I'm being a cry baby when I tell you my problems or that I have been through a lot.
I think too much.
I give good advice, but never know what to do.
I can never explain how I'm feeling, I just know what i feel.
I confuse everyone around me.
I dont understand things.
I'm never right.
I never know what I want.
I dont like showing my emotions.
I never make any sense.
I care too much about certain things.
I listen to other peoples minds and not mine.
I feel like everything I say is wrong, so decide not to say anything at all even when I know that I could be right.
I put a smile on my face as if I'm happy.
I bottle everything up, so when I try to vent it just sounds like im making everything up.
I actually don’t know how to avoid being clingy.
I can’t hold a grudge. I forgive too quickly.
I’m seriously such an idiot sometimes. Not even joking, I’m always scatterbrained and off in la la land. Half the time I don’t even understand what’s going on around me until hours later. I always make the dumbest mistakes and have to ask a million questions about how to do something so I don’t do it wrong, and even then sometimes I still do. Sometimes I really wonder….do I just not think? What is wrong with me?
I'm childish.
I force myself to do things. And that’s what causes stress and tears and heartbreaks. 
I really don't know how to stand up for myself. I'm a pushover.
I cry at almost any little thing that get's me upset.
I get jealous easily. "

Get close and you’ll end up getting hurt. That’s how I am. So are you still willing to LOVE me??